Activity

Every parent, either consciously or subconsciously, wants their children to be happy and successful in life with regards to their interests and goals which are important to them! Too often this is easier in theory, especially nowadays where they live.

Savvy parents are always looking for ways to help their children academically and emotionally. In HappyKidsHub , I needed to concentrate more on the behavioral and emotional aspects of the subject. Although I’m not an expert in psychology, I have a lot of experience over 38 years of experiencing 8 children in the home. (Not all children were home for 38 years. Most went to college at 18.) We’d 8 children over the course of 20 years and the youngest went to college at 18, so that adds up to plenty of years and different approaches with regards to the particular child’s personality.

I am an adult (older) Mom as you can do the math! Over time, I have seen this aspect and definition of “resilient” children change considerably for a more impressive percentage of children than existed when my youngest children were growing up. I’ve spent more than a minute thinking about why it has changed inside our society. I have also seen this aspect in certain grandchildren depending on their parents’ method of life’s happenings.

Again, I emphasize, I am not just a professional psychologist, but my experience because the Mom of 8 and my psychology and human behavior classes in my business curriculum in college have added help to my evaluation of my children’s’ behavior and their wants and needs!

I would like to create a few OBSERVATIONS as well as perhaps some solutions, with regard to raising a resilient child:

1) Every child differs. Look at this website have noticed that my youngest son includes a very emotional personality which lends himself to reacting to circumstances more and over evaluating situations. He could be a variety of showing to be very resilient if he could be motivated about a scenario and moves on the continuum to being less resilient if bigger emotional trials come his way. I think part of this is a mix of genetics and environment. As we as parents got older, we were a little less disciplined and “relaxed” about situations that would present themselves. I think sometimes we provided an excessive amount of a safety net since it was the “easier way” for the older parents.

2) I think our very culture today and the fact most of us you live a less strenuous life than we lived even twenty years ago very possibly facilitates a child to be less resilient. Our younger children in the millennial generation have lived different lives than our older ones. This latest generation of parents are inclined to having more disposable income and feel they should “endow” their children with the best life can provide! The underlying theme could be the pride of the parents and attempting to display to society they have it to give to their children. Nevertheless, this has been the norm a lot more than the “other” way in previous years past. It will be makes a difference in the final approach used by a kid to handle the adversities of life!

3) We reside in more of an “entitled” society today whether people desire to admit it or not. Before, our society was totally more self reliant and did not wait for society or their parents to resolve all their problems! It had been just a “given,” most children born 20 years ago, likely to “earn” what they got and didn’t expect to be showered with solutions or money to solve all their problems. This one fact MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE in their environment. When a child has to “work” for something they need rather than having it handed in their mind without the effort or sacrifice, in the end, it makes someone different from your child!

Some SOLUTIONS for parenting MAY help for current generations:

A) I am of the opinion, too many parents are setting the example that the federal government will provide a back-up should they come across financial trouble instead of responsibly handling their finances and expecting nothing from other people. It is crucial parents set the exemplory case of financial responsibility and teach their children how debt will remain using them morning, noon, and night! (student debt) This may start to be achieved by learning that making decisions motivated by immediate gratification may lead to future problems and influence their children’s attitudes to “give up” too easy in the future. It does a child “good” to wait for something and put effort into earning what they need.

B) Don’t be the one to “protect” your kids from all problems if they are not of serious consequences. If it’s the first very cold day of the season and they usually do not want to wear a coat, let them experience the consequences of these decision and you will discover that real soon they elect to wear warmer clothing. Should they get in trouble at school for something an authoritative figures has given them consequences for and it is a fair matter, support the authoritative figure! In the future that authoritative figure they’re learning to respect may be YOU! They will learn that Mom or Dad will not be to the rescue for all their problems.

I know of a predicament in which a child in his young teens started tinkering with drugs. He came from a family group that loved and cared about him very much. When he was “hanging with the incorrect” friends and would get in trouble with regulations about little things, the Mom would immediately assume he was being treated unfairly and move to lessen the results for the kid. They ALWAYS considered him a victim. The last I heard of the household situation, the young man was headed to prison for 5 years on drug charges. It had been sad because his family loved him quite definitely, but perhaps if they could have let him suffer some consequences for breaking into cars or other things, he would have discovered his lesson early and didn’t have to go on to harder consequences!

C) Counsel your children what they could experience is normal in other childrens’ lives too. If they are “homesick” when you go out of town with your husband on a small business trip and leave them with another family, tell them this a quite normal and a lot of other children experience these feelings too, but it is sometimes section of life. It generally does not necessarily, at all, require the child has to have counseling for this one situation.

Teach them should they break up with a girlfriend or boyfriend plus they feel sad, that millions of other teenagers experienced these sad feelings too. It is a normal area of the experiences which could come their way. Most everyone has experienced these feelings and that point will usually help should they “tie a knot” and hold on! Always keep a watch on the emotional progression in these matters.

Teach them that a day or a week could make a huge difference in their situation and tomorrow may very well be a better day or week! Most situations are not written in stone in life. There’s usually a solution to the problem if they give it time. Set the example for them and show them how to take action through handling your trials!!

Finally, teach them about hope. If you aren’t a religious person, per se, you still may have hope in a “higher being” if you do not believe in God. This can add a ray of desire to the problem they think isn’t surmountable today. We are here for grounds and need to give life a chance to “play out!”

I hope it has helped someone look at this life with another perspective!